Trying to Stay Positive

I don't know what I'm doing! Teaching is very hard for me here. I'm now teaching math, english and geography-everything but science, which I start on Monday. The British curriculum is so different than the American. The units I'm given to prepare aren't as structured as I'm used to. I have dozens of textbooks and websites to sort through, and pull the best things to help me deliver the information to the students. Planning lessons are so frustrating...I have a good cry daily because I'm so overwhelmed with all the things I have to learn, create lessons for, and teach.

This is really hard. On top of that, I'm sick for the second round of stomach problems, from the food here on campus. Following Dr.'s orders, I haven't eaten anything but broth soup and toast for 3 days. Last time I had a sick stomach here, it lasted for 7 days, so I hope I get better before that. It gets in the way of everything. I'm weak from lack of nutrients, I don't have much energy to plan lessons, and I have to leave the classroom to run to the bathroom.

This is all so humbling. I can't believe I'll be here 5 more weeks. I just want to go home. I'm praying that I will glorify Him in everything that I do. The staff here is so emotionally supportive and encouraging, and I hope that I can be a blessing to the staff and students here as well.

T.G.I.F.

Thank God it's Friday! It was a hard couple of days. I became really overwhelmed and wanted to throw the towel in. It has been really dark, emotionally and spiritually. Today, my master teacher, Mark asked, "You need a stiff drink?" He was joking with me of course, and it made me laugh :-)

I am struggling with the British curriculum, preparing classwork and homework, and trying to meet people's expectations. Today, things started looking up. I've been receiving such truthful encouragements, emails, text messages from many people. One of my friends here, Stefanie, has been such a blessing to me. Mark has also been giving me so much support and resources to help me teach efficiently. I thank ALL OF YOU for the bottom of my heart.

I was asked to help out on staff with a junior high girls' dorm event tomorrow. We are going to a beautiful place called Jungle Retreat for the day! I've heard that there is a swimming pool, great food and amazing scenery. I'm so excited to get away and have some fun with the girls! God is giving me all that I need. I'm so grateful.

Back in the classroom after Easter Break!

I was glad to get back to teaching after the long ten-day break. It was a good break and all, but I got a bit bored. Toward the end, I got sick of shopping, swimming and watching movies. All those things I can do at home. I'm here to teach, and that's what I wanted to get back to!

On Sunday, I went to church and the preaching was on Romans 5:1-11. The service, worship and people reminded me of EV Free, so I felt like I was at home!I love the grace, peace and hope we have because Christ died for us while we were still sinners. He loves us so much that He sacrificed everything for us, so that we may be saved (vs. 9). I want my life to be all worship to God, for His glory. HE is the reason I'm here, and He is the reason we should live.

Monday was a great full day of teaching Writing, Reading and Math. I was a bit nervous about going back into the classroom after such a long break. I wondered, will I remember all the kids' names? Will I use the wrong terminology? Can I get all the British vocabulary straight again? Well, it went very well! Thank you for all your prayers. I got 4 heartwarming emails from people praying for me on Monday morning. It was encouraging also to hear from my master teacher that I did a good job. Constructive criticism is helpful (I get that a lot), but reflective encouragement from people in authority over me is so good! It's all such a blessing.

This morning, I led the Tuesday morning Bible study for the high schoolers and staff. It went so well! I spoke on the power of the Holy Spirit, telling some things about my experiences in Calcutta and reading a passage frtom 2 Cor. 1. It's a passage about how Paul visits the Corinthians under God's will. The Holy Spirit is the one who enables him to say "Yes" to visiting people. It's a reminder that whenever we do good things, it is because the Spirit is working through us and giving us strength. Its a good reminder for me too!

Easter Break!

I'm getting good at killing spiders, moths and silverfish. Bugs are the most difficult thing for me to get accustomed to here, and they are the things that make me the most homesick. My high school core group girls know how much I hate spiders (I had sort of a melt-down at a sleepover once). So, finding at least 4 bugs a day in my room is difficult to get used to! They're big and startling! I don't like to spend much time in my dorm room, so I spend a lot of time outside....There are less bugs out there.

The girls here are so friendly and AWESOME! The ones around my age have invited me to travel and shop with them during this Easter Break. We went to church on Sunday, and lunch with at the pastor's. Following, Amy and I went swimming and read books by the pool on the beautiful sunny day. It feels a bit like Lake Arrowhead here, with the nice weather and lush, gorgeous trees.

On Monday, we braved the 3+ hour trek to Coimbatore. I went with Louise, Wendy and Amy. I love cultural differences between us, and the fact that we all connect so well. These godly women are an Irish math teacher, an Australian music teacher, and an English art teacher.

On Tuesday, I went swimming with Amy, then to dinner at a good Chinese restaurant. I had my first garlic naan! Yumm!

Since then, Amy and I traveled to the Ooty Library, Ooty museum, and a great French restaurant. I'm enjoying my break, even though I feel homesick :-)

My emotional rollercoaster: The bads and the goods

With this mixture of my 4th day of being sick to my stomach, and still being new here, I've had a mix of emotions. Having to forego meals and be confined to my bed makes me feel very alone.

Fear
Anger
Tears
Illness
Pain
Loneliness
Homesickness
Weakness
Laughter
Mercy (Recipient)
Stomach Ache
Faint-Spells
Low Energy
Joyful
Happiness
Humor
Boredom
Exhaustion
Interested in conversation
Nervous
Blessed
Connected
Joyful
Thankful
Content

God graciously gave me some joyful surprises throughout the day, like a laugh with Aaron, a talk with Ruthie, a good movie, and dinner with Amy, Chris and Fiona. Thank you Lord!

My little prayer warriors

Today was my day of illness and nostalgia. I ate something that made me get sick to my stomach. For the last 48 hours, I've been either in bed, in the bathroom, or in the campus hospital. I haven't eaten anything but broth and toast. Tonight I was diagnosed with dehydration and low blood pressure, so I stayed in the hospital bed for the evening. Being tired, sick and bored made me miss my family so much. There is something about a mother and father's care, and a sister's kiss on the cheek when I'm feeling under the weather. I get to talk with them here on video chat, and I'm so thankful for that, but it's just not the same.

I've been resting and reading a lot. I watched The Time Traveler's Wife, and it just made me miss Aaron more. Sometimes, I go out to the garden just to get some fresh air and sit on the bench. Seeing the kids walk by make me smile. They laugh, play and climb trees. Most of them know I'm sick because this is such a small school. One 4-year-old, Ashley, said in her cute British accent, "I hope you feel better soon, Miss Winter!" One 9-year-old girl, Anna, said to me tonight, "The elementary school prayed for you today. We hope you're feeling better," as I was walking to the campus hospital. What a blessing these beautiful children are. I can't help but smile and thank them. I thank God for the ways he is bringing people as substitutes for my family and Aaron while I'm missing them. Pray for my healing!

Weekend #1

Good weekend. Really, really good weekend.

On Saturday, I woke up to the sound of the little boys in my dorm complex playing and having fun. I'm honestly thankful I'm in the 3rd-5th grade boy dorm because they are so cute! They always have so much fun and they are crazy! I want one....sometime :-)

Soon after waking, I spoke with my parents and grandparents on video chat. I love them! They are so encouraging and affirming. After, I went to have some time with God in the large botanical gardens a few minute's walk away, where hundreds of tourists occupy. It was beautiful, and I got to meet lots of locals and tourists. I forgot how unusual and white I look compared to the locals here. I then headed up to Andrew and Joy's flat to have a homemade British lunch with their family. Joy made toasted ham and cheese sandwiches, and for dessert-chocolate and cream profiteroles! Look at my facebook album for pics.

http://www.facebook.com/album.php?id=68603825&aid=2087949&s=0&hash=2059cd115aa42c1bf519194c6e046694

That night, the school's student council put on a 60's event called "Purple Haze," complete with costumes, performances and tons of food. I bought a bunch of things to support their fundraising. A couple of the songs really reminded me of home- "Need You Know" by Lady Antebellum and "Beer on the Table" by Josh Thompson. The kids' fake American accent is really funny, especially when they're attempting the country twang.

On Sunday, I went to church with Stef and Amy at Tamil Baptist, a church who preaches in the local language, Tamil, and has it translated into English. It was a beautiful Easter service and I was really glad we sang "Christ the Lord is Risen Today." The pastor and his wife had us over for a delicious Indian lunch. It was so nice and I was blessed to get to know them!

The parents of the boarding school kids are in town for the biannual parents week where the kids get to show their parents around their school, and temporary "home." Tonight, it's 6:30 pm and I'm heading out to the Chapel for a service at which a bunch of missionary parents are sharing their testimonies and their ministries. I'm so excited to hear from the missionaries!

Me, Stefanie, Amy and Elly

These girls are so great :-)

God's gift of friends

I got my luggage! It's been quite an experience of which I'm grateful to be forced to go out with my luggage for these 6 days. I've been loaned 4 salwars from my new friend, Katie, and 3 of them from Dr. Revanthi. Stefanie, a teacher from Oregon, went shopping with me to get toiletries, a power surge protector, sandals and a salwar. God has shown His faithfulness and provision as I've been with out my familiar things packed in my 2 checked suitcases. Getting them late last night was a surprising blessing!

It's been a relaxing Friday. At 6 a.m., I woke up and decided to watch Cloudy With a Chance of Meatballs in bed. At 9, I went to the school's Good Friday service, then video chatted with my Dad, Grandad, Grandma and Aaron online. Seeing my loved ones, from across the world, every once in a while is a really neat thing. Mom, I want to video chat with you again soon!

I watched 17 Dresses this afternoon to unwind and relax. You'll notice in the photo I've cut my own bangs...I got a bit bored and wanted a little change of appearance. Later, I went to visit Amy's flat; she's pictured the 3rd girl, between Stafanie and Elly (far right). She made us some tea and we chatted about love lives. It turns out a lot of the single women here have attachments overseas as I do. She met me in the places where I miss Aaron. It's alright, though. I believe this distance is a good thing for both of us to go through. Later, a bunch of the staff went out to eat at an Indian hotel. I had a strawberry milkshake, cheese dolsa (like a crepe), and finger chips (french fries)!

Hinduism and Hugs

I've been coughing and sneezing so much lately. I thought I had caught a cold yesterday, but today I realize, I'm allergic to the dust on most of the books and walls here. I found out that I'm also allergic to my sheets, so I took them off before I slept. It's much better now. I slept much better last night. 8 hours!

Sleep comes easier than I thought it would. Since I'm a light sleeper, you'd think I'd be up all night with the noises outside my walls. The 4-6th grade boys who live in my dorm complex shout, laugh and pound about like elephants. Wild dogs bark, growl and fight outside noisily from dark until about 3 a.m. A Hindu call to worship, an Indain singing voice on a loud speaker, wakes me up every morning at about 5 a.m. It sounds so eery and demonic, it disturbs me and I can't get back to sleep. I'm so thankful that our God is more powerful than any false one, and much more powerful than the evil one himself. I put my ipod in my ears to drown out the Hindu singing and pray for a few more hours of sleep until I have to get up at 7:30. I haven't been able to sleep past 6 yet, but it's ok. Birds start chirping and keep me company at about 6:30, and I enjoy getting dressed early and going out to the gardens outside.

I haven't been hugged by anyone since my parents and boyfriend hugged me goodbye. Aaron was the last person I hugged, really, the last person I touched, minus the cordial hand-shakes I've politely received. I'm very concerned about being culturally appropriate, so I know that it's not permissible to touch a man. But even with women, I'm not sure yet, is it alright to hug the women I've become friends with? Is it acceptable to ask a girl for a hug goodnight? Is it alright to hug a student goodbye after we've had a conversation in her dorm at night? I've never gone a couple of days with out a hug, and I'm learning that even though physical touch isn't one of my main love languages, I do need it. It's one of the ways I feel love.